M50 F48

Kids finding out

April 02 2026

Just wondering what experienced people have had with their kids knowing you’re in the lifestyle?
We have adult kids still living at home and one caught a date leaving our outside bedroom door and is now suspicious as to what we’re up to.
Should we say nothing, make up a story or just come out to them?

report

Comments

RHP User
2 months ago
Depends how honest you feel you can generally be and how they’ll understand it.

For example, my daughter knows I have female friends I am close to and stay with. She’s met a few of them that Abi and I have developed friendships with over time.

She’s too young to have the discussion about polyamory and open relationships but I have a policy I’ll always be truthful with her.

If she asks I will tell but for now, it’s kept as close friends who sometimes stay with us.

And tbh, as polyamory becomes more socially normative, I don’t think it’ll be too much of a thing. I also want to promote a healthy view of sex and connection rather than a traditional one steeped more in religious influence.
reply
like
report
Temptress_T
2 months ago
That is always a tricky one. All our boys have now left home but they had a fair idea of what we got up to. We would have 'friends' come and stay the weekend when the kids would do to their mates places.

I think with so much being more open on social media it is a lot more accepted than it once was.

If they ask maybe it is best to just be honest.
reply
like
report
RHP User
2 months ago
We told them when they were in their late teens, they didn't judge at all. We have always been open with them , so they could come and tell us anything at all. Which they always have.
reply
like
report
MsSuperFoxy
2 months ago
I’ll admit, discussing “adult” things with your children can feel a little weird, even when they’re adults.
My daughter is 30 (very close relationship). Her view is pretty simple: She doesnt care as long as I’m happy, she’s happy.
We’ve never sat down and shared intimate details about who I’m seeing or what I get up to. That part of my life is still mine. She's fully aware of various relationships, kinks, lifestyles etc. Nothing is ever off topic.
That said, there was one funny moment when one of my toddler grandchildren discovered a few items in my bedside drawer. My daughter and I were sitting on my bed just chatting away. When we saw he had opened my bedside drawer. We just looked at each other and laughed, (LoL not sure who was embarrassed more), because those are Nana’s toys, not baby toys.

So while we respect each other’s privacy, sometimes life has its own way of creating a conversation anyway.

Ms Foxy
reply
like
report
nutsundae
2 months ago
Super tricky one, and I feel for you for the tough spot you're in. There's no single, simple answer and there's no right or wrong, in my opinion. I do think It's always prudent to have consciously considered what would happen if kids - or other significant people in your life depending on your situation - were to ever witness or find something, or worse, learn it from another source, and to have discussed and decided in advance how to handle that little crisis if it were to ever eventuate.
reply
like
report
MsSuperFoxy
2 months ago
Be very awkard if one came across a profile containing their adult child.

I'd have to go in sleath mode and have a looksie. 🫣🧐

Ms Foxy
reply
like
report
BarberBoss1981
2 months ago
My daughter is 24 and I have been a single mum most of her life so we are really close...about a year ago a situation came up for me and she wanted to know what was happening...I couldnt really tell her without giving her more in depth context.

We sat and talked about non monogamy, group parties and accepting people for their choices.

She was like ok cool and now every time I leave the house shes like "going to one of your sex parties" with a cheeky smile
reply
like
report
Sescalinata
2 months ago
We had a big RHP event organised, and a backdrop and some props were dropped off at my home. My son asked, What's all this? I told him what was going on and he said, Ok, cool. He always says, if I'm happy he's happy. We have a pretty good bond, I'm lucky
reply
like
report
PandaAndBri
22 days ago
Our son is now 18 and we have just had the chat with him so he knows. We are happily married and happy playing together but we also enjoy playing separately so we had the chat in case he gets any of his friends come up to him and say “I saw your Mum/Dad at a bar with a guy/girl who’s not your Dad/Mum.” In Sth East QLD there is only 2 degrees of separation so it’s possible. Just to not freak out if that occurs and he was fine with it but did NOT want any details. So for us it has been good. It depends on the age of your kids and the relationship you have with them I guess also. Bri
reply
like
report

Kids finding out

Comments

Tags

Boards

Forum help